we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
