Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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