Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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