I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
