I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Randomize
