I love black thongs
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
