I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
