Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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