Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
