Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
