so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
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At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize