: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize