He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
