I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize