I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize