Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
look no pants
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize
