If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize
