We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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