Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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