Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Randomize
