I smell stomach acid.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
