I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
