Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
No stitches, just platelets and will power
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
