the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
