I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
