there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
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