We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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