wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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