did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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