ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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