just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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