Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
