Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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