RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
