Ambien. No doubt about it.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
