They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
