Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
