on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize