I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
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I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
It was like giving head to a cactus.
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It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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