trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Bring me that man meat
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
