we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
