There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
