he puts the penis in happiness.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize