no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
