Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
