if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Just high enough for therapy.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize