They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Randomize
