If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
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If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
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I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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