My hair reeks of homosexuality.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize