I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize